I really like blood. Not in a psycho āIām going to drink your bloodā kind of way, but I really celebrate my scars and battle wounds because it represents trying something newā¦ weāll get back to this.
Whenās the last time you just had to send it off of a cliff but you were tied down by the olā āGolden Handcuffsā? You knowā¦ the deal where youāve got a situation / job thatās so good & comfy where thereās no logical reason to leave other than the fact that itās just time to go.
FUN & USELESS FACT: 2/3 of Godās name is āGOā and sometimes you just need to remember that.
Iāll never forget the time when I was really struggling to make a decision about the next step in my lifeā¦ and you know when you just need the wise words of your friends? Same.
I had been working with youth for a church in Connecticut for almost 7 years and they treated us like gold but it was time to leaveā¦ it was time for something else but it was soooooo bloody comfy (yep, the olā āGolden Handcuffsā thing).
My bro, the one we affectionately nicknamed āBRICKā, grabs me by the shoulders, looks me straight in the windows of my soul and says, āTAKE A F**KING RISKā!
He was right.
I needed to hear that. I needed the encouragement to just send it.
I think thatās why I celebrate blood. In the last week Iāve had the privilege of seeing blood drip from different parts of my body including my hand, knee, elbow, upper leg, and abdomen. It makes me feel alive. It reminds me that I took a risk. Blood isnāt the goal, but sometimes itās an inevitable part of the journey. Yesterday, I tried mountain biking down a steep cliff-like rock face that I had never tried before and went ass-over-tea-kettle over my bars and scraped right down the frigginā face of this thing like a cheese grater. Pics or it didnāt happen, right? Youāre welcome.
So, what are your golden handcuffs… and what would taking a risk look like to you?
Blood is neat
Tim says
Nico!! Thanks for this. Iāve forgotten to follow the advice from Coors lightās billboard they had on the Westside years ago that said ālive vicariously through yourself.ā At the end of the day can you look back and say ādamn! What a ride!ā Harder to do when married with multiple children but itās so important.
Vanessa says
Taking risks , getting scratched up and then the art is to translate it to learning what you really want to be better at and get up – clear the wound make sure you have no internal external infection ( =stop talking discouragement to yourself ) and get up and Go Do what you feel makes you spread the wings of your heart ! Grow courage and wisdom together being alive!
Cheers
Ilse de Witte says
I disagree, coach!
Nico says
Oooooh, I want to hear more about your perspective… please?
Ilse says
I haven’t read the blog very thoroughly but it seems like you think that quitting your job when it gets comfortable after a number of years is a good idea for everyone, when it is something that was right for yĆ³u. I’ve worked at the same job for ten years and it keeps getting better for me. I’ve learned in my training as a coach that the answers lie within the coachee amd coaching is about helping the coachee find them. It seems as though you already know the answer for every coachee: quit your job and take the road les travelled by.
Your website does look very nice though and I think many people will feel ‘aangesproken’ by it.
By the way I remembered that I was at your wedding with Ingrid a very long time ago, thinking of my reply to your comment I remembered you two skating into the church together. Ingrid came to our house for a while when I was about ten years old. A nice memory! She was really special and creative. A while ago I found a poem she made for me in my scrapbook back then. So funny and creative.
Nico says
Oooooh, Ilse, thanks so much for chiming in. Iām sorry that youāre getting the impression that I have any answers for anyone. Totally not the case. Maybe Iāve miscommunicated something here because I think that a lot of people have dream jobs and are absolutely in the right place. The answer isnāt to quit your job, the clue that youāre in the right place is peace. I believe that if youāre struggling and/or have a pile of restlessness that this might be a clue that you need to rethink what youāre doing. As a coach, I love being able to pull that out of people by mirroring what theyāre saying, figuring out their values, and ask some powerful questions to see if theyāre on the right path.
Either way, Iām stoked that youāre in such a great job situation and it sounds like youāre living a very fulfilled life. Well done… thatās beautiful.
And yes, I remember you and your family from our time in Holland… Ingrid really admired your family and all the love you showed her. I appreciate that.
Ilse says
Get it! I think people are lucky to have you as their coach.