A little chat with my son (Sylas Boesten) about lessons learned from losing his mama (Ingrid Boesten) to cancer and how to hold hope and loss in the same hand. I also share a story about one of the most beautiful things Ingrid did a couple of months before she died.
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“Life will break you. Nobody can protect you from that, and living alone won’t either, for solitude will also break you with its yearning. You have to love. You have to feel. It is the reason you are here on earth. You are here to risk your heart. You are here to be swallowed up. And when it happens that you are broken, or betrayed, or left, or hurt, or death brushes near, let yourself sit by an apple tree and listen to the apples falling all around you in heaps, wasting their sweetness. Tell yourself you tasted as many as you could.” – Louise Erdrich
When you think about those wild little moments in your life that inspired you to make those big decisions, what was happening in your heart? And what led you to those moments? And when do you think the next one will happen?
I sing a song I wrote for my Ingrid (my late wife) for our 7 year anniversary called “Seven”. It was a major moment in our relationship that shifted us into having more hope with and for each other.
If you’re looking to make some changes in your life or wondering what it might take, reach out to me to see if having some life coaching together might be a good fit.
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A few little stories about how Mr. Rogers changed my life… and the power of being seen. Who has seen YOU in your life? The people who believed in you, cared for you, called out the best in you, and were able to look beyond your fuck-ups. Those people deserve to be honoured.
The song “Don’t Let Go” is a PJ Morton cover. That guy is worth checking out.
Won’t You Be My Neighbor (documentary)
A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood (feature film)
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From the top of Knox Mountain in Kelowna we (and by “we” I mean “I”) talk about the beautifully sucky gifts of being broken along with a new original breakup song “Storm”.
I reference the Japanese art known as Kintsukuroi: the Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum. As a philosophy, it treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise, acknowledging that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.
If you need / want some support working through some hard & broken times, reach out to Nico for a coaching session here.
The Japanese art of repairing broken pottery with lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum. As a philosophy, it treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise, acknowledging that the piece is more beautiful for having been broken.
Have you ever lost something or someone and wondered if you’d ever be able to work through it? How does this work? What is the gift of grief?
These are some of the questions I (Nico Boesten) ask Joshua Smith, a local (Kelowna, BC) singer songwriter and friend who just released an album written about his dad who passed last year. We play a live version of “Waiting on the Day” at the end.
To hear more of Joshua Smith’s music including his latest single: http://joshuasmithsongs.com
If you’re curious about getting some coaching from Nico, reach out here: email@example.com
What’s your happy place (both emotionally & geographically)?
In the bowels of the forest, my son & I camped out at a natural hot springs where this was recorded.
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Tension is where the life is.